Acceptance Equals Recovery

        I am happy to share that I am still witnessing slow, but sustained steps toward recovery from my symptoms of anxiety and the related DP/DR symptoms that compelled me to start this blog.  One of the things that I have come to believe and understand is that the less I fight my symptoms the less they bother me.  I would liken this to the ways kids deal with bullying.  More times than not if you don't let the bully see that he or she is bothering you they often leave you alone.  Please take this comparison from the glass half full perspective as the point of the analogy is to further drive home my belief that we can all recover from our symptoms.  When I say to stop fighting your symptoms I mean from an attitude standpoint.  I have contended throughout this entire healing process that DP/DR seems to be a problem of personal perspective or perception rather than anything changing too dramatically in the external world.  As a result, this gives us some control as to how much our symptoms bother us or at least how big of a role they play in our lives.  Think back to that kid who gets bullied again.  Maybe the bully really does bother him at school and makes him really angry and difficult to be around at home.  However, maybe this kid has found some solace at his karate class, or has made friends at the local library or park.  Maybe this young kid is a really talented artist and as he needed a way to relieve his stress of being bullied he was able to fully realize his potential.  Many of the obstacles we have in life will be defined by how we deal with them.  Focus on your locus of control ie. look for what you can control rather than what you can't at this point.  I have come to accept that the way I see the world now is not really something I can change at this point, but I can change my response.  Think of a time when you were really stressed, anxious, or upset.  We all have go to moves for when we feel this way.  But imagine if when we were really stressed we decided to recite the alphabet, or call our mother, or sing nonsense songs.  We do have control of how we respond.  To take this idea a bit further, imagine how powerful our recovery process could be if instead of allowing the DP/DR symptoms to define us we decided to define our responses.  Perhaps you don't have to start with a positive thing like running, or exercise, or deep breathing.  Maybe you just need to sing a nonsense song just to prove that you're in control.  Then you can gradually move up to things that are good for you.
        The title of this post is "Acceptance Equals Recovery."  When I have come to accept my symptoms for what they are-JUST SYMPTOMS-I have found myself better equipped to deal with them.  Now when I feel detached from the moment, or I feel like I'm in a dream, or that the world is odd or unreal I just let it happen rather than panic.  As humans we are not designed to exist in perpetual suffering as witnessed by all of the people who don't experience DP/DR.  I try to focus on my response to the symptoms rather than the symptoms themselves.  For example, when I start to feel detached or in a dreamlike state I start to notice my thoughts and my mind race.  In the past I would continue to let it race until I was in a full on panic.  Now I have decided to allow the symptoms to be what they are and focus my thoughts on positive or neutral things or at least describing in my mind the environment around me.  I chose the title for this post based on the fact that the more I have allowed the symptoms into my life the less I have noticed them.  They don't bother me as much because I choose to control my response.  It sounds a lot harder than it is, but I encourage you to try in small steps.  Every time you put positive energy into something it comes right back to you.  There isn't a single good action that is wasted even if you don't see or notice the immediate results.  Say to yourself these symptoms will not define me.  I define my life through my deliberate thoughts and actions.  I am in control even when I don't notice that I am.  Stay strong.  Stay committed. Stay positive.